Tutoring: Prevent High School Drop-outs - Reasons Your Teen May Need a Tutor

As a new school year has arrived some parents are faced with the fact that their child needs extra help academically.  The sooner this is recognized and addressed, the less likely you will have a failing student.

There are many free and low-cost opportunities to find tutors for your child.  Ask a Librarian has become a major benefit to teens in helping them with reference materials.

Does your child need a tutor?  Here are ten reasons that may answer that question.

1. They work hard, but results are minimal - If your child puts forth the effort each night but isn’t seeing results, a well-trained tutor would be a good investment. A tutor will teach them how to study independently, which is a basic skill they’ll need to have mastered by the time they enter college. They also offer tutelage pertaining to note-taking, organizational and time management skills that will improve your child’s chances of success in every subject.
2. They’re easily discouraged -Does your child’s motivation wane as the subject becomes more difficult? A couple of bad grades can lead to several more, and before you know it, they’ve fallen into an academic hole of which they’re unable to find their way out. The personal attention provided by a tutor can steer them around it, giving them the confidence needed to conquer a challenge.
3. Lessons don’t match their learning style -Not every student learns in the same manner. Perhaps your child is a social learner who needs consistent interaction in order to fully grasp a subject. If their teacher is more of a lecturer, a tutor can provide the social learning experience your child desires. Additionally, lesson plans tend to be rigid and teachers generally prefer not to stray away from them. The use of alternative methods can provide your child with easier and more efficient ways to solve a math problem, balance an equation or write an essay.
4. Their teacher is subpar -Like any other profession, the teaching profession has its good and bad apples. During secondary school, students typically lack the study skills to learn a subject on their own, so they’re unable to compensate for wasted class time. A qualified tutor can teach your child everything they need to know and more, breaking their dependence on their subpar teacher.
5. They consistently struggle in one subject -Perhaps a subject like math just isn’t your child’s strong-suit and they’ve never performed well in those classes. By hiring tutor who specializes in that particular area, you can turn your child’s weakness into a strength. A good tutor should be able to tap into your child’s potential, or at the very least, ensure the subject is no longer a drag on their transcript.
6. Curves only cover the problem -Your child may have a decent grade, but it doesn’t mean they fully understand the subject matter. What they miss now could affect them in the future, causing them to fall behind their peers. For example, if they struggle with polynomials in Algebra, they’re destined to struggle in chemistry and physics.
7. They’re nervous about college -The ultra-competitive nature of high schools these days has caused many kids to fold under the pressure. Teenagers who can barely manage their current lives are expected to know exactly what they want to accomplish in the future. A tutor encourages them to focus on the task at hand, teaching the study skills, time management skills and mindset they need for success -now.
8. They experience test anxiety -There’s no denying the SAT and ACT are key components of the college application process. A good or bad score can affect your child’s ability to gain admission into the school of their dreams. Luckily, there is an abundance of experienced SAT and ACT tutors who can teach your child essential test-taking strategies that will enable them to maximize their score. These tutors possess the resources – like practice exams – that can be used to quell big test anxiety.
9. School isn’t challenging enough -Perhaps your child isn’t being sufficiently challenged by their studies and you don’t want their potential to go to waste. Or maybe they’ve taken an interest in a particular subject – like a foreign language – and you want to cultivate a passion. Either way, a tutor will utilize your child’s free time in a stimulating manner.
10. No other help is available -As previously mentioned, you may not be able to offer the help your child needs in order to realize their potential in a subject. After all, it has been years since you were in their shoes, and more likely than not, teaching isn’t your strength. A good tutor will be able to explain the tedious details of a subject in way that your child can understand.

Source: Christian Colleges Online

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Academic Pressure

School is open - great tips for parents and their kids with academic stress.

Source: Connect with Kids

“You have to keep things in perspective. Academics are only a part of your life.”

– Zachary, 14

“Well, I’m getting all A’s, so that’s good,” he says.

He has won awards for academic achievement, including one for having the highest grade-point average. But what happens if someday Zachary doesn’t perform well in school?

“Part of me is always worried about that,” says his mother, Jen Yu. “Some day, when he hits that roadblock, is he gonna be able to accept it, or is it gonna be something, you know, that really bothers him a lot?”

While that may not be a problem for Zachary, yet, more and more kids are experiencing anxiety about being perfect in school.

According to the latest State of our Nation’s Youth report, 79 percent of teens say the pressure to get good grades is a problem. That’s up from 62 percent in 2001.

45 percent polled say that pressure is “major”, up from 19 percent.

Experts say, for many teens, even when they do well, they still think they could do better.

“The problem is that they will always be anxious. They will always fail. Even when they have a 4-point average they will always fail in their own eyes and they can’t ever relax,” explains Dr. Allen Carter, a psychologist.

He says parents should help kids understand being perfect isn’t realistic and help them create balance in their lives- beyond academics.

Zachary’s parents encourage him to learn music, play games and simply relax.

“You have to keep things in perspective,“ Zachary says. “Academics are only a part of your life, and they should only stay a part of it and not become your whole life.”

Tips for Parents

Even children who earn high marks at school may be suffering emotional distress and anxiety due to the high expectations they have set for themselves, according to a study from Smith College. In a study of 36 children in third through fifth grades, researchers found that children who rated high on perfectionism exhibited significantly more anxiety and dissatisfaction with their performance on computer tasks than their low-perfectionism peers, even when both groups performed equally well. In fact, the perfectionist kids predicted they would perform less well than the low-perfectionism kids. Lead researcher Patricia DiBartolo says the problem is not that kids are setting high standards; rather, they become too distressed and are not able to accept the mistakes they make in the course of learning.

“Perfectionistic kids get caught in a vicious cycle. When approaching a task or project, they feel less able to succeed, get anxious and then evaluate their performance more negatively than their non-perfectionistic peers,” DiBartolo said.

How big of a problem is perfectionism in childhood? According to the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, perfectionism is recognized as a “common correlate” of social anxiety disorder. Nationally, 1% (nearly 400,000) of children between the ages of 10 and 18 suffer from a clinical level of social anxiety disorder. Counselors at the University of Dundee associate the following negative feelings, thoughts and beliefs with perfectionism:

Fear of failure: Perfectionists often equate failure to achieve their goals with a lack of personal worth or value.
Fear of making mistakes: Perfectionists often equate mistakes with failure. In orienting their lives around avoiding mistakes, perfectionists miss opportunities to learn and grow.
Fear of disapproval: If they let others see their flaws, perfectionists often fear that they will no longer be accepted. Trying to be perfect is a way of trying to protect themselves from criticism, rejection and disapproval.
All-or-none thinking: Perfectionists frequently believe that they are worthless if their accomplishments are not perfect. Perfectionists have difficulty seeing situations in perspective. For example, a straight A student who receives a B might believe, “I am a total failure."
Overemphasis on “shoulds”: Perfectionists' lives are often structured by an endless list of “shoulds" that serve as rigid rules for how their lives must be led. With such an overemphasis on shoulds, perfectionists rarely take into account their own wants and desires.
Believing that others are easily successful: Perfectionists tend to perceive others as achieving success with a minimum of effort, few errors, emotional stress and maximum self-confidence. At the same time, perfectionists view their own efforts as unending and forever inadequate.
As a parent, how can you determine if your child has problems with perfectionism? Experts at the University of Texas cite the following guidelines comparing a perfectionist to a healthy striver:

Perfectionist
Healthy Striver

Sets standards beyond reach and reason
Is never satisfied by anything less than perfection
Becomes dysfunctionally depressed when experiences failure and disappointment
Is preoccupied with fear of failure and disapproval, which can deplete energy levels
Sees mistakes as evidence of unworthiness
Becomes overly defensive when criticized
Sets high standards but just beyond reach
Enjoys process as well as outcome
Bounces back from failure and disappointment quickly and with energy
Keeps normal anxiety and fear of failure and disapproval within bounds, using them to create energy
Sees mistakes as opportunities for growth and learning
Reacts positively to helpful criticism


The first step in changing your child’s perfectionistic attitudes to healthy striving is to help him or her realize that perfectionism is undesirable. The University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign suggests teaching your child the following strategies to change the behaviors and thoughts that fuel his or her perfectionism:

Set realistic and reachable goals based on your own wants and needs and what you have accomplished in the past. This step will enable you to achieve and also will lead to a greater sense of self-esteem.
Set subsequent goals in a sequential manner. As you reach a goal, set your next goal one level beyond your present level of accomplishment.
Experiment with your standards for success. Choose any activity and instead of aiming for 100%, try for 90%, 80% or even 60% success. This step will help you to realize that the world does not end when you are not perfect.
Focus on the process of doing an activity not just on the end result. Evaluate your success not only in terms of what you accomplished but also in terms of how much you enjoyed the task. Recognize that value exists in the process of pursuing a goal.
Use feelings of anxiety and depression as opportunities to ask yourself, “Have I set up impossible expectations for myself in this situation?"
Confront the fears that may be behind your perfectionism by asking yourself, “Of what am I afraid? What is the worst thing that could happen?"
Recognize that many positive things can only be learned by making mistakes. When you make a mistake ask, “What can I learn from this experience?" More specifically, think of a recent mistake you have made and list all the things you can learn from it.
References
American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry
The Horatio Alger Association of Distinguished Americans
Smith College
University of Dundee
University of Texas
University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign